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I have max memory set. But at least 1 time a day the Sql Server hits over 95% of the ram in the box, and page faults for more. In the meantime the website is throwing very obscure timeouts on simple

select count(1) where id=1 

type queries

I'm a developer and don't normally get into the server administration to this level of detail. So please go easy on the level of your answers.

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What is your cost of parallelism configured for (right click on server and hit options) – Michael Haren Mar 2 '10 at 16:55
The Cost of parallelism threshold is set to 5 – DevelopingChris Mar 2 '10 at 16:58
That's normal. What's your max memory set to? – Michael Haren Mar 2 '10 at 17:08
The max memory is set to 14 GB on a 16 GB box, does it need to be lower? – DevelopingChris Mar 2 '10 at 17:15
My best advice would be to try and monitor what's going on with SQL Server Profiler. It's a program that comes installed with SQL Server that let's you see what kind of queries are hitting your databases. Unfortunately, it's not the easiest thing to just pick up and learn but it might help lead you in the right direction. – Sean Howat Mar 3 '10 at 15:25

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