Question

We're installing a new firewall for our organization and want to display a message other than the boring and bland: "This site has been blocked by the network administrator".

I'm looking for something similar to Firefox's "Well, this is embarrassing" message, displayed after an un-recoverable error - but for firewall blocked websites.

I'm having a brain fart and can't come up with anything remotely funny. Anybody got any ideas?

Answer 1

"Whoa now, look at that stuff at home!"

or

"Yeah, we had to notify your manager about this one..."

Answer 2

The place I used to work at had a great bright orange background. You could see across the open plan office whenever someone had surfed to a disallowed page.

Much funnier than any error message.

Answer 3

I'm gonna be boring and say stick with the generic one. You never know when some beancounter type with a grudge against IT might decide to "take offence".

Otherwise, something like this might do the job: http://jokegurus.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/gandalf-sign.jpg

Answer 4

Just what do you think you're doing, Dave?

Answer 5

Hey the MAN has me watching this site. I won't tell him you wanted to go here this time.

Pals forever...Your Firewall Software

Answer 6

Re-direct to a jpg of a BSOD. :)

Answer 7

do a page with an animated GIF of a magnifying glass circling a computer saying something like determing surfing allowance based on productivity for the day ...

Calculating ...

Then after a few seconds say "you will be allowed 2 minutes surfing time when you have done some work."

Answer 8

Try apelad's HTTP error flickr set, released under a CC licence; for example:

I like this one for 404:

Answer 9

The best I've seen is one which advises: "You have reached the end of the Internet. Take two steps back and turn left to continue." It was accompanied by a large image of a stop sign.

Answer 10

Move along. There's nothing to see here.

Answer 11

Some FBI or NSA looking website?

Answer 12

"Do you surf your mother with that URL?"

Answer 13

"The administration failed at humour and thus had to block this site."

Answer 14

"biennnnnnn"

Answer 15

How about:

Your supervisor has been notified that you have attempted to access [site]. This issue will be addressed at the end of the next pay period.

I don't know. Just put a picture of a deer or something.

"biennnnnnn" ain't bad either. Funny guy.

Answer 16

You could always redirect them to Rick, it would be funny for a couple days.

Answer 17

I don't remember the site at the moment, but it was similar to this one where you can write haiku error messages for pages not available.

Otherwise I found it humorous when I saw a giant red stop sign up with "Inappropriate" for a label.

It's also possible, depending on your filtering mechanism, to script something like Fortune (on Linux) to spit a new quote to a file that can be posted or quoted in your error page. Maybe even script an HTML page with that in it. Couple it with Cowsay and you'll have some fun.

Answer 18

something along the lines of http://www.pragprog.com/thispagedoesntexist but change it to site, instead of page.

Answer 19

Firewall Fail

Answer 20

We have a web server that runs some tools that is publicly accessible. The index does a simple redirect that says "Sending you to the site you really meant to go to..." It then redirects to icanhascheezburger.

Answer 21

"Error: Insufficient yarn."

Answer 22

AYFABTU! All your Firewalls are belong to us!

and have an appropriate FAIL [place appropriate animal] also! :)

Answer 23

"Sorry, but my manager is looking over my shoulder and I don't want to get in trouble."

"Oops! Looks like I've misplaced that one. How about this one instead?"

"I'm telling on you!"

"Is that your manager behind you?"

Answer 24

"This web site has exceeded its daily bandwidth limit, please try again tomorrow"

(or "please do not try again")

"Aw, snap!"

"Your web browser is now up for disciplinary charges"

Answer 25

In big letters:

You must be at least 18 to enter this site.

with the usual age verification inputs or yes/no buttons.

Answer 26

That horrible, horrible flash video that screams "HEY EVERYBODY, I'M LOOKING AT GAY PORN".

But that would probably get you fired, so be warned.

Answer 27

Everytime you try to acces this site, god kills a kitten,

Think about the goddamn kitthens before doing this,

you'll think about it eh ?